You really like her, so now you want to know how to make the first move on a girl. Just use these tips, and you will make her very happy – and yourself too.
When it comes to knowing how to make the first move on a girl, you need to understand that it is not as complicated as you might think. In fact, it is pretty simple. Maintain respect and go for it.
But if you are looking for some more specifics, such as should you wait to ask for a second date until the end of the date or go for it at dinner? Should you go in for a kiss or a full makeout session?
If so, then continue reading for advice from a girl who has made the first move and has had guys make the first move both successfully and not so much.
Should you make the first move on a girl?
Before getting into figuring out how to make the first move on a girl, you might be asking yourself, should you even? And the answer is yes. Why not?
Whether you are scared of rejection or scared you are coming on too strong, there are ways to take that leap without so much risk. If you are interested in a girl and feel a connection, go for it.
Some girls like making the first move, but many of us still love that old-fashioned guy who makes it clear what he wants. So, if she hasn’t made the first move, she may very well be waiting for you to do it yourself.
How to make the first move on a girl
Going into your big first move is nerve-racking. It would be weird if it wasn’t. So take a deep breath and go for it. The worst thing that could happen is she turns you down, and you move on. No biggie.
Whether your first move is asking for a girl’s number, kissing her, or asking her out on an old-school date, you can do it. Here’s how:
1. Read the signs
If she isn’t looking you in the eye and seems disinterested in making conversation, she isn’t interested. But if she strokes your arm, laughs at your jokes, and makes eye contact, go for it.
2. Stop overthinking
You do not need to write out a script in your mind before you talk to this girl. Go with the vibe of the conversation. Do what feels right at the moment.
3. Take it slow
Yes, women like a guy who can be bold, but don’t just do what you want. As we said, read the room. If you had a nice date and feel the chemistry, you can go in for a goodnight kiss. But don’t take it beyond that.
4. Don’t fight the awkwardness
Lean into it. If you are awkward or shy, let that be your thing. Don’t fight it, or you could come off even more nervous.
Awkwardness does not have to be a bad thing. In fact, it can be quite endearing. So go in to hold her hand. If you miss it, laugh about it and try again. Awkwardness is actually a great icebreaker.
5. Give her your number
Another way to make the first move on a girl is to simply ask for her number. A lot of guys ask girls for their numbers. And although that is fine, it can take more than a few moments for a girl to know if she is actually interested.
Instead of asking her, offer her your number. That way, the ball is in her court. She can decide if she wants to reach out or not. Yes, this can make it a bit more of a waiting game for you, but it lets her accept or decline your offer on her timetable. You are still making the first move but giving her the second.
6. Appreciate her
The mistake many guys make when it comes to making the first move is expecting a certain response. A lot of men think a woman should automatically be flattered by the interest, but that is not how it works.
She could be in a bad mood or having an off day. Maybe she is in a relationship or not interested in men at all. Don’t assume your compliment is always something she wants. Show her you appreciate what she has to say. Ask her opinion on your outfit or what he favorite food order is.
7. Be okay with a no
One of the first things you need to do when it comes to knowing how to make the first move on a girl is to be realistic. Don’t go into the first move with a negative outlook, but rather a realistic one. There is a very real chance she could reject you. But go in with confidence.
The thing about confidence is that it comes from within. So even if she isn’t interested, you will keep your cool, be respectful, and be happy you tried.
8. Be funny
Humor is something that puts just about everyone at ease. If you can make her genuinely laugh and the conversation flows, making the first move shouldn’t come out of the blue.
If you are laughing about The Bachelor, for example, challenge her to a bet on who gets sent home next week. Make it your way in.
9. Talk about it first
If you can’t think of an original way to ask her out or go in for a kiss, just be straightforward and talk about it. Let her know you want to make the first move but aren’t sure what she would be comfortable with.
Being respectful and open about this is a great way to start things off physically and romantically.
10. Compliment her mind
Yes, girls love hearing they are beautiful, but that doesn’t show true interest. Compliment her determination at work, her loyalty to her friends, or even her devotion to school.
Girls like to know that they are more than just a body to you. They want to know that you respect her and like her in other ways, not just physically.
11. Don’t put down other girls
“You’re not like other girls” is a phrase so many guys go to as a compliment, but it is really just a way of saying, “I don’t like most girls, but you are different.” Saying this is a turn-off to most girls.
So instead, just compliment her. Don’t bring other girls into it.
12. Get consent
It is the 21st century, so you should already know that you need to ask for consent before you make the first move on a girl. And if you aren’t sure what you have the green light for, simply ask. It is not that hard.
13. Let it be natural
Just go with what you’re feeling in the moment. Don’t try to force a cheesy line or say something you think she wants to hear. If you chat about her favorite restaurant, mention you’d love to take her there sometime.
And if you are talking at the end of a date and feel like a kiss is appropriate but aren’t sure how she would feel, say you’ve been thinking about kissing her all night and want to know how she feels.
14. Be honest
Trying to find the perfect way to make the first move is impossible. There is no one way to always get it right and have her return your interest. So just put it all out there and be honest.
Let her know you’re interested in going out. Let her know you have had a great time getting to know her but want to take things to the next level romantically.
15. Ask her to teach you something
Mansplaining is a real issue. Men seem to think that they know so much, and they have to explain it to women in a patronizing way.
Instead, let her teach you something. If she says she is amazing at baking, ask her if she would be willing to give you a beginner’s lesson because you’re new to baking. Or even let her know you’re trying to become more aware of what’s happening with the feminist movement but don’t know where to begin.
16. Make a small gesture
Sure this is generic, but buy her a drink or bring her flowers. It may not be groundbreaking, but it is a classic that has worked for guys for ages.
Offer to buy her a drink at the bar. If she is a friend or coworker, bring her a bouquet of flowers or even a single red rose and ask her out. The gesture is very sweet.
17. Do it via text
We all get nervous, but thankfully texting was invented for these exact moments. Of course, you do have to have her number already, but if you are friends or you even have her email, go for it.
Let her know you’re interested but weren’t sure how to let her know. So you are just putting it out there so you won’t regret not making a move.
18. Ask about her family
This may sound weird but stick with us for a minute. When you are interested in someone, you talk about your job, what TV shows you watch, and maybe your pets. But asking about someone’s childhood or relationship with their family is intimate.
Getting to know each other on that deeper level takes you a step closer to the next move.
19. Talk to her friend
You may not always have access to her friends. If you do, ask for some advice. Some girls like a super bold guy who just goes for it. Others prefer a guy to move slower.
If you share a friend group, work together, or even know her friends, ask someone if she would be interested in you and what you can do to make the first move. Getting that inside scoop gives you a leg up.
There are plenty of ways to make the first move on a girl, but with specifics from those that know her, you are more likely to come off well.
20. Stand or sit close to her
Body language is so important. It accounts for 80-90% of the meaning of a message. So, if you make sure your body is close to hers, she will know what your intentions are even if you don’t tell her with your words.
Hopefully, when you close the space between you, she will be receptive. Then, you can read her body language to see if she likes it.
21. Drop hints
If you don’t want to come right out and make a move like kissing her, you can hint around at it. For example, you can ask her about what she considers a good kiss.
Or you can talk about how some people are nervous about making the first move. Hinting around about it might increase the chances that she will catch on and respond to you positively.
22. Joke about it
It’s never easy to just come right out and make the first move because no one wants to be rejected. But if you joke about it, she might warm up to the idea.
You can say something like, “I think I will just throw you down right here and make out with you so everyone can watch!” Hopefully, she’ll laugh and might even say something like, “well, why don’t you do it?”
23. Tease her
Girls like it when guys keep things light-hearted and fun. So, you can always tease her to get her laughing. Just make sure that you’re teasing her about something but actually complimenting her at the same time.
For example, you can say something like, “all the girls in school must have hated you because you look like a Barbie Doll!” That’s actually a compliment, but it’s said in a teasing, silly manner.
24. Gently touch her
As we said earlier, body language is very powerful, so gently touching her is a great way to make a move on a girl. So, if you’re standing or sitting next to her, you can use some touch.
Some examples include brushing her hair away from her face or lightly touching her lower back as you enter a door. Little touches like that can be powerful because they will get her thinking about you making a move on her.
25. Look into her eyes
As the saying goes, “the eyes are the window to the soul.” In other words, eye contact can tell you a lot about a person’s interest. So, use eye contact to your advantage.
Now, you don’t want to stare at her so much that you creep her out. But you want to give her that look that tells her you would love to kiss her. She will know “the look” – pretty much everyone does.
26. Let her make the first move
You probably read this article so you could find out how to make the first move on a girl, but sometimes the best thing to do is wait for her to make the first move.